Wednesday, 7 December 2011

Calm before the Storm

High winds are forecast - so what says you?  Well, one of my phobias is the and wind actually - find it difficult to function under these terrible conditions.

It is also Prelim Time for my son.  He is in a negative frame of mind.  He 'cannot do' first and then five minutes later 'oh, I know this'.  So, I am 'helping' with his maths.  A couple of things we both got stuck on.  It was nearly there but any noise bopped it right back out of the brain....this too will pass....or fail....whichever.   I suppose I want him to pass everything but actually, even if he doesn't get great marks, it will be a kick when he needs it.  Too much time on the Xbox and not enough time on the books leads to..........misery in exams.  Not actually worth it.  Better to study hard for a pretty small period of time and get those grades.   But he has to come to that conclusion himself.  Nothing I say will make any difference.   I could ban the Xbox of course - but that would only achieve hostility.   Possibly failing on purpose?  Who knows.  Kids can be a funny breed! 

So, I am living his panic.  I am stressing about the high winds.  The schools are closing early tomorrow so add in a bit of disruption to my routine and you have Aspie turmoil. 

If only I could take it all in my stride.  But it's all so important.  All terribly meaningful to me.  I would love for my son to feel confident, I would like for it to be a normal winter day (cold and rain but no snow and wind).   I want to sit at my desk in the office until I see the dark sky through the roof windows and realise it's time to pack up...

You can't have everything you want.   Make the best of what you have.  Isn't that what we are told to think?  If only Aspie brains worked that way. 

Keep safe.


  1. I thought of you when I heard about the high winds. I hope you forged them well.

    My sympathy for your restless feelings. I have them too. sometimes they are so intolerable it seems that I cannot go on. But, it passes.

    I am glad that you have a place to write and share. Sometimes the only thing that helps is knowing that you are not alone.

  2. Absolutely! This blog is only for fun but it does help a little to get life in perspective. Even NT's have a miserable time - in fact they are probably more miserable than me!